Unapologetic

From clarity to collapse - a descent into addiction through the addict's own unraveling voice. The First Hit (Euphoria) I met her in a whisper, Silver tongue and glassy grace. She slid beneath my skin like prayer And kissed me into space. No thunder in the needle, Just a hum beneath the skin,  Soft enough to make me weep, Strong enough to let her in. The world turned velvet. My bones turned light. For once in my life, Everything felt right. The Want Becomes Need (Cracks Begin) It was just once. Then once again. Then once became The way I breathe. Lost time. Lost taste. Lost little things. A memory here, A wedding ring. She took my days in pieces Gentle, slow decay. I gave her everything I had And she still asked me to stay. My girl left a note. Said: "You choose." I chose wrong. Or I chose to lose. Fragmentation (Descent) Bills- Gone Teeth- Ache No food / no sleep Just shake Just Shake I think I saw my brother Or a cop Or My shadow Laughed at the wall today Wa...

I sip the silence like bitter wine, masking the tremble behind my spine. The bottle’s not glass, but a glance I deflect, a memory sealed in a room I neglect. I joke like a shield, I laugh through the pain, each punchline a tourniquet tight on a vein. Truth festers quiet where no one can see I’m dying in private, but smiling for free. The mirror knows more than I’ll ever tell. It stares with a judgment I wear far too well. Every scar’s stitched with threads of “I’m fine,” while shame draws the borders outside every line. There’s comfort in chaos I crafted alone, a kingdom of coping I've claimed as my own. I kneel to the gods of distraction and fear, praying the past won’t echo too near. I know there are hands that would offer their light, but pride grips my throat in the dead of the night. Help feels like weakness, admitting defeat so I march through my hell with unblistered feet. But deep in the marrow, a whisper remains: You’re not just your damage, you’re more than yo...